Why I smelt like lollies for a day

A few words from my son-in-law to be (Tyson), who knows what's good for him and takes the wrath of the boys in the bush.....

WHY DO YOU SMELL LIKE LOLLIES??

I am not a fan of this 'natural health' thing my darling girlfriend and her mother seem to love. No sir. I thought it was just them being nice when I was sick and they made me jelly but no, later I find out that they hid some sort of supplement into it. They say it was that that made me better, I say it was my antibiotics. We will never know. I'm no fool, I know that the soap in my shower is apparently some sort of magical mineral bar, I know that she replaced my normal soap with some girly smelling liquid soap, whatever. I pretend not to notice, but what she doesn't know is that my normal soap is hidden away in the bottom draw. OH and did I mention that time she made me sit in the lounge room with a "foot bath" which was really a bucket full of some special salt and warm water? HMMMMMMM. 

But lets get to the point. Here I was, trying to have a peaceful shower when this head pops around the door. "I need a favor". I agreed without knowing what it was because I knew if I didn't she would just sulk until I did, but I could tell by her over-sweet tone there was something up. So,I asked what it was she needed me for. "I need you to use this deodorant because you smell really bad and I don't" Well, that's one way to butter me up I suppose. She quickly added "It's for mum" and smiled. Of course. I ALWAYS end up being crash test dummy for her mums products (and even though I whinge and moan, I am 100% OK with this because I am one of the lucky few who actually my partners mum, but I would never let her know because then I would be roped into everything) but the last thing I thought she would ask is for me to try out a new deodorant. 

SURE, that's easy I said as I got out and put some under my arm pits. She grinned and ran away. Odd. Then it hit me. I SMELL LIKE LOLLIES!!! That was the catch! But, she was out the door already, she knew she was busted. 

The next morning at 2am I wake and wonder out to the bathroom. "DON'T FORGET MUMS DEODORANT" a horse morning voice calls from the bedroom. Any other morning she sleeps like a log and won't even wake up for a kiss goodbye but this morning she wakes up to remind me to put on deodorant. Mhmmm. So on it goes and I am out the door and off to the bush I go.  

I pull up at work, "Who smells like a girl?" me, its me guys, yes ha ha so funny, lets get on with life. "Your machine smells like red frogs!" yes, I know. 

Lunch time, "You still smell like lollies! What the hell has your missus done to you now?!" yep, funny.

Home time,  "That sh*t lasts forever!" Yep, I know, how amazing.

I get home and decide I should go visit my girlfriend. So, I head on over to her work. She grins when she sees me, "Let me smell you!" any other time she wouldn't come near me with a 10 foot pole after a full days work. And, believe it or not, I STILL SMELL LIKE LOLLIES! 

Long story short, normally I apply deodorant at least every 2 hours otherwise I get BO they could smell on the moon, but, one time in the morning with this stuff and I was good to go! What wasn't so fantastic though is when, at 2am the next morning I picked up my jumper only to find IT STILL SMELT GIRLY! Ahhhhhh and day 2 begins....... 


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